So, sitting and creating and coming up with something that I started writing a year ago when I moved into my bachelor pad. You know the one that started out as a dream come true to a landlord/tenant nightmere... (see previous on-going blog.. yup, that one will get really juicy). Well I started writing this track called.. well, let's call it GND. JBass gave me a smooth ass beat and so it began with the story about da GND... I figured... write it real time as I live it. So a year passes now and the focus has been on promotions, performing, community, networking and being responsible for being socially active.
So today I'm trying to remember what I wrote a year ago and it hit me.. all the lyrics, one after the other as I was writing and looping the beat JBass gave me. It my heart fluttered so hard I had to put the pen down and sit up straight.. What was the message? What was the reason for getting all twisted in the gut? Previous reactions and/or thoughts would be negative in nature like... "I remember the plans I had when I moved in there and the million things that got in the way of those plans" or "What if I stayed in that bachelor pad a bachelor" or "Blah Blah Stinkin' Ridiculous Blah"
O R ! ! !
Present reaction. Real Time Real World Reaction. The actual reaction to that sweet twisting emotion deep inside was one of "Wow! What a year!" AND "Wow, things really took a seriously different turn than expected and it is amazing what came out of it, none of which was on that list of plans!" AND " Wow! I would have never thought I would have those opportunites, or had that relationship go that way, or play those shows and experience these things" AND "Wow, this is what it's like get over serious heart break and find . . . " AND "That actually didn't hurt so bad" AND "Dang that day felt so gooood" AND "Holy Smokes time flies like the wind waiting for nothing and nobody to make excuse after excuse" AND "Yup, i'mo live for today Today. Just let it take me where it takes me"
Still make plans and make genuine efforts to see them through or end up a waste of skin and muscle and bones. Learn what you can learn along the way and teach what you can teach in shit you say. Dang, I really wanna see the children in my life. I really really am gonna talk to them, listen to them and spend some time with them. All of them that I can... Taye, Caliyah, Dreyson, Arielle, Zachary, Deja, Sciera, Sunday, Inaijah, Roshan, Will, Lexxa and Chloe and Elizabeth and whatever child that is close to me or close to one close to me... and Aisha/Cullin's boy... Sweet sweet whoever you are.
I'm straying from topic to topic with this smooth loop in my dome. GND close by at rest as the synastria is communicated subconsciously within the unexpected union.... so perfectly going down with perfect in perfections and unexpected ups and downs and ups and downs... shiiiiiiiiiit!
I guess this very note is an example of how I had a plan coming in and it went all kinds of un-expected directions like life did... Like life does. Like we do. Like we are life. Yeah... Ha, like Yeeeeeaaahhh ok, I can dig it!
